CRUMBLES!!

seckel pears?
they're small, but they are sooo mightily sweet,
and that's a good thing, if you're not trying to over-sugar yourself.
of course,
i sort of AM trying to over-sugar myself,
because i think i could maybe afford to be a whole lot sweeter in general.
however,
i had a big basket of those sweet, small, seckel jauns
and i quartered the whole lot of them, save one,
and tossed them with 2 tsp powdered ginger;
3 T brown sugar;
2 T non-GMO organic cornstarch;
1 tsp vanilla bean paste;
and a cup and a half of toasted pecans!!!
that's like, four cups of pear wedges, hanging out and soaking up all that stuff.
yup.
what for?
for filling up an exxxtra-special holiday tart, obviously!
word.
i love a fancy treat,
and since i was already going to make a few classic pies,
i figured i should probably freak it off with a luxuriously indulgent fancy one, too.
rules is rules, after all,
and i was sure that somewhere on the dessert plate there need to be steusel, too.
wait.
what?
yes.
fancy tart, streusel topping, gingered pears and pecans,
AND a supreme shortbread crust....
damn, that's a lot going on,
but, too much is the right amount,
and responsibly hesitant weak sauce is NOT invited to my holiday facestuffin' sessions-
nope.
not now and not ever.
but,
here's what IS coming through on that TILTY tip this weekend:

I GOT THE TARTITUDE FORTITUDE GRATITUDE ATTITUDE, DUDES!!!
mmmmmmmmmmhmmmm.
that's HUGE flavor, friends.
seriously.
the crusty shortbread lining the rim is pretty much a superhero.
you wanna make a little/
ok.
-
*
SHORTY-BREAD!
-
preheat your oven to 400℉
-
in a medium mixing bowl, combine all the following things:
10 T vegan butter;
1/2 tsp salt;
2 tsp vanilla;
1 cup dark brown sugar;
3 T vegan creamchee';
add:
2 cups flour;
3-5 T non-dairy milk-
hand stir that stuff, until it sticks together, but isn't wet at all.
wrap it up, chill it out in the fridge for 15 minutes-1 hr,
roll it our on a well-floured surface, and press that 1/4' thick goodness into a pie pan;
or cut it into shapes for decorating;
or hand form little cookie blops;
or whatever, man.
but, bake it for 12-15 minutes on it's own,
or give it some twenty-something-style time limit if it's part of a tart,
pie, grunt, slump, cobbler, or crumble.
word up.
*
and speaking of crOmbles-
that streusely crumb is KEY to succeeding at tart activation.
that's real.
and, it was so simple to concoct on the fly!
to do it to it, y'just moosh together:
3 T vegan  butts;
1/2 cup kapowdered sugar;
1 tsp vanilla;
1 tsp cinnamon;
1/4 cup rolled oats;
3/4 cup fresh-ground oat flour.
cut and chopped and combined until it's all one big tasty jumble of goodness.
i mean, come ON, that's as simple as it gets.
without it, though, your treats are bullsh!t,
and so are you.
true story.
***********
i love a good treat.
i love a good story.
i love a good time.
wait.
one of those things is NOT true.
i am not fun,
and i do NOT pursue fun for it's own sake.
i don't get it.
i have things to DO, guys.
all that effing off just seems weird to me.
sure, i s'pose regular-A* ordinary folks need a break from their daily trivialities,
but,
maybe, and i'm certainly no authority on the subject,
maybe they just need to do MORE, harder, fatsem louder, and longer-
so there are far fewer trivialities,
and far greater endeavors towards tangibly rewarding purposeful awesomeness?
i'm not out having fun, kids.
nope,
instead, i'm making an effort.
hey, now,
could be i'm just pure rubbish at it and that why it takes so much work.....
i'm not sure, but i think that to get to where i wanna be,
it won't be from F*ing off and having fun.
who knows?
hopefully, the answers present themselves while i'm working,
or i'll likely be too busy to notice them otherwise;
never quiet, never soft.....