uh-huh.
that's what you want.
littler bittier skinny dongers,
with purple and white thin stripey skins,
for maximum edibility and minimal seedy bitterness.
yup.
there you go, bro-
that's my tip for today:
get the graffiti jauns, because they're better.
yesterday, i took that advice,
and i'm glad i did, too.
mmhmm.
because little magnificent medallions of meaty eggless plant matter
were ON the main menu for a late-nite high-intensity melanzane meal.
word up.
check the molto-italiano-type teleport:
MELLY-MEL-ANZANE FOR YOUR FACE!!
spaghetti?
expert!
popeyed baby spinach?
expert!!
homemade marinara?
expert!!!
nootch and parsley sprankles?
expert!!!!
cornflake-&-herb-crusted fried, layered, chee'd and baked eggplant?
c'mon.
that's TILTY AF, son!
the diced-up daiya mozzarella is key here.
if you're running it long, you're ding it wrong.
meltability is increased a hundredfold in smaller sections.
io had layers on layers of all o it too.
hot sauce, eggplant, chee';
over and over and over-
...and then even MORE sauce, obvi,
because too much is the right amount.
heck yes.
-
slice and salt your eggplant, let it sit a bit, and then rinse it off.
-
in a little bowl,
combine a cup of non-dairy milk, a tablespoon of nutritional yeast,
and 2 tablespoons of ground flax/chia meal, and let it sit and activate the thickness within.
-
in another 'nother bowl, crunch up a heavy handful of cornflakes,
a healthy shake of non-GMO organic cornstarch, a scoop of nootch,
and a few shakes each of: GPOP, oregano, basil, rosemary, parsley, thyme, sage,
pink salt, black pepper, and a baby bit of smoky paprika.
do y'see where we're headed?
sure you do.
dunk the slices in the milky boi bath,
dredge 'em through the flakes,
and fry 'em in a fat splash of olive oil in a bog ol' pan, until they're browned on both sides,
flipping just the once, to ensure the steamiest dreamiest sizzles on the griddle.
yes!
only the should you beging the stack and chee' layers.
also,
i'd bake them for as long as it takes, but at least 15 minutes, at 375℉.
that's real.
the sauce will soak in and elevate all the flavors to eleven.
trust me.
huh?
what?!
oh, yeah.
the SAUCE.
it's so simple you'll slap yourself silly if you ruin it:
-
*
SAUCE!
-
in a small sauce pot, simmer up, in a tablespoonful of olive oil:
one small minced sweet onion;
one little peeled and minced carrot;
one lovely clove of crushed garlic;
add oregano, thyme, sage, basil, and nutritional yeast,
just long enough to toast 'em up a bit in the sweet juicy veg melt-
then hit it with a tablespoon of red wine vinegar, and a tablespoon of soy sauce,
and give it another 'nother litttle minute to sizzle,
before adding a cup of chopped sweet baby tomatoes-
they'll cook down quickly, and you'll love the texture,
unless of course you're a weak baby,
in which case, who really even cares what you think anyway?
now, add 2 cups of crushed tomatoes, and a pinch of salt, and a pinch of sugar,
and a half cup of water, and let it all cook while all the other stuff is happening.
oh, yeah. start your sauce first, because the longer it cooks, the better it tastes.
and turn it DOWN, duder. don't bubble the blops all over yourself,
and don't burn the bottom.
c'mon.
do a good job.
-
you can see what i made,
but you can't relish the resplendent flavors.
that's precisely why you should make some for yourself.
a good eggplant dish is worth eleven ordinary pasta platters!
that's real.
***********
writing about food is easier than writing about real life.
today is the day, though, neighbors.
guy fawke's day.
V for Vendetta day.
ANONYMOUS day.
or,
as it's also known, perhaps most awesomely;
BONFIRE NIGHT!
hot fire is the truth.
full moon werewolfenism is also present at the moment, too.
it's a collision of events that are all awesome,
and it's all about to unfold in front of my face from now until nightfall.
i feel lucky to be present for it, to be a participant in it,
and i'm sure as sh!t grateful for all the time i have been given.
this is IT,
and that's kind of a LOT,
but in the best way possible;
never quiet, never soft.....
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