Thursday, January 3


i dunno, duders-
sometimes i'm just not sure what to make.
i mean, i always want cake.
i'm sorta just like that, but i don't always know what to do about it.
....bake some, obvi, but what kind, man??
that's the thing.
so, i got the basics together, and just let the treats make themselves,
using me as a conduit,
like a ouija planchette with a spatula attached.
i got a bowl out, and preheated the oven,
and by the time i was ready to go to work?
i had these:

vanilla bean blocks!
that's chocolaty drizzle over chocolate frosting on top.
well, yeah, AND coconut frosting, too-
that's right, neighbors- MORE frosting is better.
disappearing fast?
indeed they are-
if you're gonna have one, you may as well have a couple;
too much IS the right amount, y'know.
that's real.
what's in 'em?
it goes like this-
preheat your oven to 365℉
grease the pan of your choice- clearly used a dozen-square pan
in a medium metal mixing bowl, cream together:
1/2 cup sugar;
1/2 cup light brown sugar;
1/2 tsp salt;
8 T (1 stick) vegan butter;
1 tsp vanilla;
1 tsp vanilla bean paste.
thoroughly blend that up, and stir in:
3 T plain non-dairy yogurt;
3 T tapioca flour.
mix well, then add:
2 1/4 cup flour;
2 tsp baking powder;
1 tsp baking soda;
1 1/4 cup non-dairy milk.
stir completely, whipping it by hand as best you can,
and spoon the results evenly into your pan(s).
bake the whole thing for 22-30 minutes, depending on your oven-
you want golden cake, not brown cake, and not beige cake, either.
you'll know it when you see it.
cool 'em and get 'em read for the drizz'.
that's 1/3 cup dark chocolate chips and 2 T non-dairy milk tempered over medium-low heat,
and worked over while still melty through a pastry bag,
or plastic baggie with one corner snipped....
the frosting is the secret, though, bro.
not every bite will get you some of it,
so it's like activating the turbo-boost halfway through an already elite treat.
that's how it should be.
exxxtras are special, and i like that.
2 cups kaPOWdered sugar;
1 tsp vanilla;
2 T cocoa;
5 T softened vegan butts;
1/4 cup + 1-2 tsp non-dairy milk,
all whipped in your stand-up mixer on high speed until fluffffffffffy af.
wordimus prime.
that's how you do it.
it's just quick and easy cake time around here.
and today?
it's another 'nother snow day,
so ANYthing might happen again right now!
the woodsly goodness is a heck of a place to be in winter.
it's as beautiful as it gets, but it reps a hard style right through every last dang minute-
i've got work to do, and my work is personal-
i'm a working person, i put in work, i work with purpose-
and i'm gonna ge into some sh!t that tastes great, on purpose,
before AND after i tattzap the crap out of today.
what's for supper?
i dunno!
what's up right now?
also a mystery-
i'm gonna get a bowl and let it guide me like a seance, son.
it's all really happening, but we're gonna find out what that means later;
never quiet, never soft.....

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