NOODLEBOWLER!

noodles.
spicy noodles.
a spicy sichuan-style, korean-sauced, japanese udon activated bowl of
pan-asian awesomeness,
turned up, turned out, and turned on,
all for my big fat face to enjoy, with all the brow-sweaty, nose-sniffling mouth-tingles
that you'd hope for-
...if you were the type to be hopeful about the euphoric adrenaline rush that
comes complimentary with a big ol' pot of hottness, and chilis, and sauce!
dudes!!
the hot hots were in full effect,
and the gochujang-enhanced sesame fried tofu was the least spicy bit of the meal!
yup.
so much heat, in fact, that we had the whole-head dizzybuzz that comes from
the automatic physiological response to hot fiery attackin'.
damn, but it tasted so good, there was no chance to stop eating it up.
that's for realsies, too.
fully-immersed shark gluttony can't be stopped until it's all gone.
that's called a feeding frenzy, and it's the only way to overdo it,
whenever you're determined to go had on the noods.
word up.
it was a sexxxy dish, for sure.
check the teleport:

FUEGOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
yeah, i got the pea shoots, and the purple carrots, and the mung bean sprouts,
all to add crawnch to all that boomfire-
and those juicy udons get pan fried a bit, with those furious dried chilis,
in sesame oil, with sesame sossamon seeds, and a splash of h2o, too.....
but it was the SAUCES that brought this baby b!tch way up and over the top.
yup.
after the tofu was crisped up on all sides in a light toasted sesame/vegetable oil blend,
the whole pan was doused in the gochujingle-jangle jauns, for sure!
-
ok, right quick, rapid fire,
just as a guideline:
*
2 T gochujang paste, 1 T soy sauce, 1 T rice wine vinegar, 1 T spirit vinegar,
1 tsp garlic powder, 1 tsp red chili flakes!!!
^^^^so, so SO easy, but packed to the limit with rich, sumptuous, succulent flavorious victory!
mmmm.
the whole thing absorbed into that thirsty tofu, and to quote my dinner companion:
'this tastes like comfort'.
uh-huh.
if comfort has a simmering heat, and a little bit of sweet,
and a whole lot of salt, then you can't get much more comfortable than this, man.
-
and then the separate, but equally expert veggie deluxxxe portion of the program:
*
2 cups of  chopped broccoli, with severed stems and all,
plus 1/4 cup of chopped onion, 3 cloves of thick-sliced garlic,
a habanero, and a teaspoon of minced jalapeno,
seared in sesame oil, and then totally activated in a red chili and black vinegar bath!
yup.
that's what's up!!
-
you add agave, and black vinegar, and black pepper, and a pinch of sichuan peppercorns,
plus a dash of red chili flakes, and soy sauce, to a dash of chili paste,
with a scoop of cornstarch, all eyeballed and off-the-cuff'd in the moment,
a la prima for your pan and eventually your stomach.
guys!
you need it!
the starch thickens the sauce, the sauce wilts the brox, the spice fires up the engines,
and before much time has passed,
you're livin' in a flaming furnace of spice and tastiness.
real talk, if you hate big strong manly food,
go eat a nugget, you weak little baby.
this is grown-up berserker nutrition, and it's not for you.
the rest of us will be here with numb lips and fuzzy frontal lobes,
indulging in huge bowls of barbarian excess.
and that's the truth.
sesame and scallion sprankles complete the look.
i mean, rules is rules, neighbors.
don't come through on that weak sh!t.
no spranks?
no thanks.
word.
***********
...and now, it's snowing.
a lot.
it does that.
nature wins, kids,
and there's no accouting for it.
you ust shovel, and suck it up.
you don't have to like it,
and i don't.
but, it's all really happening,
and i'll be driving myself to work in a bit, to see how many pickup-trucking d!ckturds
need terrible tattoos to prove their worth as neckbiscuits of the great white north.
sweet.
movie checks and treacherous roads go together like bitter and sweet....
we'll see what happens, as it happens;
never quiet, never soft.....