Thursday, July 27


blueberries and buckwheat and coconut?!
hell yes.
little waffles are kind of winning me over lately.
i think it's probably our human genetic predisposition to care for tiny cuties
and itty-bitty babies that has me all caught up in small waffle magic.
it's not me, it's my DNA.
i like that i can eat six of them,
and they're not much more batter than a trio of regular-sized jauns.
that's a neat trick for my bellyhole.
it's MORE food, but it's also the same, duders.
i really like that.
and the flavor combination?
buckwheat is kind of nutty.
blueberries, straight outta maine, are always invited,
and coconut?
well, coconut is the male or break, bruh.
if you HATE coconut,
it's usually because you've been allowed to indulge
in unadventurous beige-and-grey meals for too damned long.
that's no joke.
coconut is expert. simple as that.
i'm not saying that poor person coconut is any good.
i never have liked that bottom-rung budget btchbaggery,
but that unsweetened unsulphured flaky business is 100% elite.
real talk.
when i'm making batter,
i have to have it.
and so i do.
check the day-off big B-type teleport:

real new hampshire maple syrup.
if you're reppin' the doo-doo sap that is that brown-corn crud?
you can't come over.
that's what grossies do, man.
stop that.
that fruit salad was the TRUTH.
tropical, but also, seasonal, and fully turnt an tilty with that lime zest sprankle game.
wordimus prime.
the weird canada-ham that i got is still brickishly pink, and frustratingly good,
i had some, i made some, and i ate some.
that's it.
the scrambo, as usual, was expert AF.
i love a good scrambulator,
and this one had just a touch of crispy on the edges.
GPOP, turmeric, smoked paprika, hemp hearts, salt, pepper, and nootch.
tha's what you put to it, if you wanna put the hottness in your mouth.
do that.
and those waffles?
i made eight, i ate six, and i loved every minute.
here's how it happened:
in a small mixing bowl,
3 T raw sugar;
2/3 cup flour;
1 1/2 tsp bakey powder;
1 tsp bakey soda;
1/3 cup buckwheat flour;
1/4 cup crushed luxurious coconut flakes;
3 T melted butts;
3 T vegan sour cream;
1 tsp vanilla;
1/2 cup low-bush small bloobs;
1/2 cup non-dairy milk.
^^^dope, right?
yeah, i know,
all that decadence is right there for the griddlin'.
and you KNOW i couldn't leave it at that-
too much is the right amount.
so there's that good-good syrup,
but then there's also vegan whipped cream,
AND toasted coconut sprankles!
i LOVE it when breakfast tries to kill you with quality and quantity.
i hope you make this stuff.
and if you don;t, i hope you're at least wishing i'd invite you over.
you just might get an invite,
unless you're a coconut despiser-
then, you can't come in.
rules is rules, buddy.
i'm two dinners behind on posting.
i apologize.
i've just been balls-deep and butt-nasty in some new tattoo studio shopping,
and it takes up an enormous chunk of my allotted time to be wakeful and productive.
it's all still really happening,
you just have to  wait an extra minute to hear about it;
never quiet, never soft.....

No comments: