DON'T SLEEP!

if you're getting eight or more hours of slumberland dreaminess,
i am very confused by you.
how?
are you super successful?
i mean, that's just so much sleep.
y'all must have expert time management skills,
or incredible efficiency at all tasks, both assigned and voluntary.
i mean,
i'm up for about nineteen or twenty hours every damned day,
and i'm still feeling the press of time as each day breaks,
and it doesn't let up as each night falls.
meanwhile, somehow, you're cool with just crashing out and getting some rest?
that's weird.
i mean, if you're cool with it, be cool with it, i guess.
i can't hang out doing nothing for that long, though.
it's just not my style.
instead,
i'm on some other other sh!t-
like,
combining all the good flavors,
and activating all the best textures,
to make something superior to each individual component-
that's real, neighbors.
like, for example,
let's just take a look at some new cookies.
yup.
cookies.
circles of sugary floury flavorbombin', live and direct to your mutha-effin' face!
teleport:

WOOOOOOOOOOOOORD!!!
peanut butter!
coconut!!
chocolate chips!!!
love!!!!
c'mon, man,
that's what's good.
and,
there's peanut buttery coocnut icing!
and, as we all know, rules is rules...
so yeah, those're rich people coconut sprankles on top!
you want the rundown?
ok.
you can have it-
-
*
CHOCOCOCOP'BUTT COOKIES!!
-
preheat your oven to 375℉.
-
in a medium mixing bowl, preferably stainless steel, for aesthetic effect,
cream up:
1 cup coconut palm sugar;
1/2 tsp salt;
2 tsp vanilla;
8 T non-dairy butterish;
1/3 cup medium flake unsweetened coconut;
1 tsp coconut extract.
when that's all mixed and mashed,
add:
1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce; .
1/2 cup creamy organic natural peanut butter.
stir that in very well,
and add:
2 1/4 cups flour;
1 tsp baking soda;
1 tsp baking powder;
1/4 cup coconut flour;
1/4 cup pulverized coconut flakes.
2/3 cup mini chocolate chips (obvi the vegan ones, duh)
-
guys, that's it.
seriously.
make golf balls, and flatten them,
and space them a few inches apart-
then bake 'em for 13 minutes,
and let them cool on a rack.
once they're ready,
ice 'em up, duder!
*
that's 1 tsp peanut butter;
1/2 cup powdered sugar;
1/4 tsp vanilla;
1/4 tsp coconut extract;
2-3T coconut milk.
boom!
how dope?
SO dope.
and the spranks?
well,
too much is the right amount,
and i'd hate to understate the taste exxxplosions that'll happen
when you add that little somethin' somethin'.
i'm just sayin'.
why wouldn't you activate that hottness?
probably because you're sleeping, right?
lame!
guys,
cookies are so easy,
and so awesome,
and dangerously edible.
i had more than my fair share,
and i can see the consequences shaping up into some sort of blarp.
ANYway,
they're super effing good,
but,
maybe share them with your friends so you don't turn into a sloppy mess.
or turn into a sloppy mess....
i'm not the boss of you, bro.
*
one work ends, and another begins.
i'm so nervous and excited and anxious and energized by the prospect
of AMPERSAND TATTOO.
uh-huh.
a living, breathing entity, composed entirely of creativity, positivity, and expertism.
and really,
what else do you need?
a tattoo, hopefully.
otherwise,
it won't last long, kids.
ha.
it's all really happening,
that's the whole point;
never quiet, never soft.....