Tuesday, July 11


my children love noodles.
they might want them every night.
for real.
and while i'm not normally a pasta pig,
when we're all together,
i can somehow hang out a little extra with all that starchy wet wheat.
they're psyched, and that makes me psyched,
and then we're ALL psyched,
and that's the point when the really good stuff gets poppin' on our plates
straight out of the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress test kitchen.
last night it was a luscious linguine extravaganza.
according to them, i suggested it a few nights ago,
at which time it stuck in their brains as a certainty.
...and so it was.
check the teleport:

i get busy when it's supper time.
and moreover, i get expert on a sauce or two.
and that's no joke.
did we tune up a huge pot of that pasta?
and a huge head of broccoli?
and a bucket of baby bellas?
heck yes we did.
how much garlic is there all together in this dish?
too much is the right amount!!!
y'want the lowdown rundown?
it's like this:
in a cup, or bowl, whisk together:
1 1/2 cups non-dairy milk;
1 T ea Garlic Powder/ Onion Powder;
dash of salt;
3 T nutritional yeast;
1 T flour.
2 tsp white wine vinegar.
set that aside momentarily.
dice half a small sweet onion and saute it in 3 T earth balance vegan butter-
when it just barely begins to color,
add 2 large cloves sliced garlic and sizzle it into all that buttery liquid.
NOW add the milky wetness, and let it all simmer together, and thicken up,
with a healthy level of stirring to prevent clumps and burns, of course.
it'll get thick with the quickness,
so that you're on some big fat creamy saucy action, just about immediately.
saute your sliced mushrooms in a big pan or skillet on high heat,
with a little salt, olive oil, and in this instance, a tablespoon of minced onion
will add all the caramelizing brownification that you crave,
without wetting down and sliming up your 'shrooms.
i like my mushies 0% mushy.
that's the truth.
and browned baby bellas are better than beige, bro.
that's also the truth.
the brox?
well, i mean, nobod likes olive green broccoli,
and raw florets won't win over any folks, either.
that means y'gotta hit the sweet spot, and get 'em braised enough to be firm,
but toothsome and tender....
like, add some pasta water to the mushroom pan, (sans mushrooms)
along with the chopped broccoli,
and cover it with a lid, so the liquid steams while it sizzles.
bright green goodness is what we want, man.
that's how it works.
boil up your pasta, al dente,
drain it, and add it back to the big pot along with 3/4 of the SAUCE,
allllll the broccoli,
and a handful of finely chopped parsley.
toss it together, and serve it up, man.
c'mon, don't just look at it.
i'm sayin'-
we want to EAT it.
topped with those shrooms,
MORE parsley sprankles,
AND fried garlic sprankles,
as well as the last of the SAUCE!
that's molto expert, son.
...believe it.
creamy, saucy, brocc'd up noodles,
AND those firm mushrooms,
and all that garlic?
i had what we needed,
and we got what we wanted;
so for a few minutes, while we swirled our 'guine around our forks,
and fed our faces full of 'fraid-not-'fredo,
everything was awesome everywhere, at least, as far as we were concerned.
and let's not leave out that heroic hot fire on the rim of the plate, kid.
wordimus prime,
i'm talking about that garlic toast!
so buttery, so spicy, so garlic-boosted up and away into the stratosphere!!
sourdough spelt slices, buttered, dusted with nootch, GPOP, and black pepper-
activated with crushed garlic, mixed with olive oil,
and baked at 375℉ for eleven minutes,
so only one side gets crisp,
while the other stays so soft!!!
it's got that sharp garlic kick, but it also has that smooth GPOP richness.
just because rules is rules,
and overdoing it with more explosions and glitz is the name of the game,
there's fire-roasted tomato flake sprankles, too.
heckin' right, buddy- i doo-doo that freaky sh!t.
once again, today is the day.
on the ones,
every day is, when you think about it....
but this is the last one for a while.
the last full day with my two terrifics.
the finale for our family togetherness.
the sayonara swan song of our simultaneous spanning of space and time.
and that's a gigantic bummer, bruh.
a week's worth of intense hanging out, and talks, and laughs,
and food (SO much food) is not nearly enough.
these two teens keep me motivated to be a better than the best version of myself.
that's real.
i mean it.
otherwise, what the F* am i teaching them?
to be mediocre? ...no way.
to settle for remaining average? ...uh-uh.
to take it easy? ...ew. s'gross.
the pursuit of happiness is dependent on enacting just one overarching rule.
and you know what we have to do:
just be dope, or F* right off.
that's composed of the holy trinity:
trying hard, paying attention, and knowing stuff.
if you're doing those three,
the big picture paints itself.
and anything less is doo-doo buttery diaperbaby diarrhea.
i am grateful for the time i have been given.
i'm luckier than i deserve to have a pair of powerful, smart, clever,
funny fresh-to-death scions to share it with.
it's all really happening,
and the simple fact that it's never enough is a testament to just how good it is.
not everybody is a miracle, but these two certainly qualify;
never quiet, never soft.....

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