Friday, July 14


cake is great.
cake is good.
cake is tasty.
cake is HERE!!!
after a day of car ridin',
i came home and baked the sh!t out of some treats.
and then,
i woke up early and decorated those jauns with all the little exxxtras.
i mean,
what do you think i am?
some kind of lazy A*-hole? way.
too much of a good thing is NOT a thing.
in fact,
too much is the right amount,
and that's a thing.
when i decided to get expert on some chocolate chip cake,
how many chocolate chips do you think i used?
check the cakey-cake'm-type teleport:

go ahead, count 'em-
there's TONS of little mini baby choco-chiplettes!!!
the very best part of a day is the treats.
i mean,
i did some cool tattoos,
i met some cool people,
i walked my little buddy through our neighborhood,
and through the downtown village, too-
all of that was pretty neat.
the treats situation was ten times more terrific than the highest score
that any of that other stuff could hope to achieve.
word up.
and here's the thing-
i rep these single-layer cakes regularly,
although they are far from regular.
a single layer is basically the no-occasion height for a cake.
as in-
anytime it's not that special of a day, one layer is the appropriate size for a cakey delight.
makes sense, right?
two or more seems more fitting for a festival, a fȇte, a fiesta, or a feast-
but a little one story circle or square is just about the cutest just-because cake size.
the key is to overdo the dopeness in crumb and crown,
so that you keep it at eleven in a smaller package.
you want to make some of this?
it's like this:
preheat your oven to 365℉
in your trusty stand mixer, cream together:
8 T (1 stick) earth balance vegan butter;
1 cup organic sugar;
1/4 cup brown sugar;
2 tsp vanilla;
1/2 tsp salt.
-as soon as that's all mashed up,
whisk in:
3/4 cup non-dairy yogurt.
when that's a wet and fluffy mess, add:
2 1/2 cups flour;
2 T organic cornstarch;
1/4 cup tapioca flour;
2 tsp bakey kapowder;
1 tsp bakey soda;
1/2 cup mini vegan dark chocolate chips;
1 cup non-dairy milk + 1 T lemon juice.
whip that into a frenzy, and spread it evenly into a 9" springform.
bake that baby boo-boo for 35-45 minutes,  until the center is firm,
and a cake tester comes out clean.
don't frost it until it's cool, either.
because that's not cool.
the frosting is simple:
in your stand mixer, again, you're gonna make some expert sh!t happen-

with 3+ cups powdered sugar;
1 stick (8T) vegan butterish;
1 tsp vanilla;
1/4 cup non-dairy milk.
i also ground up 2 T dark chocolate bar in half, for that added upgrade magic.
yes i did.
and it made a huge difference.
there's ground chocolate sprankles,
and carefully arranged-slice-planning-chips, too.
MORE chocolaty chippage is GOOD for you.
i have no science to support that, but i think it might be true anyway.
it's friday!
which means nothing for those of us who always work.
it might be important if you're the type to have weekends off.
there are a few days ahead with which to go and do awesome stuff.
i really hope you do that.
i know i'm gonna.
and that's with a full workload.
awesome is what's up.
and if you choose anything less,
you are NOT a miracle.
if you're ready to have fun,
and make yourself into a one-person party-time excellent adventure,
then you're invited to my miracle manor,
so we can activate some new hottness together.
i've got lots to do,
and i'll bet you do too.
so, let's get on it about gittin' it,
and go after it.
it's all really happening, right now.
i think we might want to make sure we're doing our part to participate;
never quiet, never soft.....

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