Friday, July 28


rice noodles?
spicy oelek chili sauce?
crawnchy veggies?
coconut-fried tofu?
toasty peanut sprankles?
check and mate, neighbors.
noods have been my go-to quick dinner staple lately.
i mean,
they're fast, they're filling and they're so fresh-
when you fire up the flames of spicy heat and garlic'd goodness,
all tossed until embossed with the sauce?
that's just good stuff.
and i like good stuff.
i'm working towards all the goods,
and in between, i'm getting expert on the spiciest noods, too.
that's real.
check the teleport:

ready in minutes.
i'm hungry, dudes, and it's a powerful hunger at that.
who has time to wait around when a savage stormswept raging gypsy appetite emerges?
not me.
by now, i think making noodles is pretty self-explanatory, right?
ok. good.
(aw, bro-there are usually instructions on the box/bag, anyway, man....jeez, )
the main thing to consider when effing around with asian-themed stir-fry-style hottness
is that the SAUCE is the driving force behind the entire flavor profile,
and a good sauce is great news for success on your plate.
all those crawnchy cukes and radishes, shoots, sprouts, and snappy peas are awesome-
but that's a crudite platter, not a glorious feast...
and sure jalapenos are nice,
and toasted roasted peanuts are, too-
carrots and cabbage are pretty neat.
heck, the onion, garlic, celery, broccoli sesame sizzle-up was on point-
and that juicy pineapple was ripe AF...
but without SAUCE, it all ain't nothin' but a bunch of sad salad sucker sh!t.
let's assume you know about basil and scallions and raw veg vs stir-try jauns.
so, instead, we're gonna focus on making sure that the unifying force that
activates and energizes all the components is hot and wet and really F*ing delicious.
2 T soy sauce;
3 T rice wine vinegar;
1 T sriracha;
1 T chili paste;
2 T agave;
1 clove crushed garlic;
1 tsp crushed red pepper;
Garlic Powder, Onion Powder;
cayenne, black pepper, coriander seed;
4 leaves torn fresh basil.
^ duuuuuudes, how simple is that?
i know, right?
and if you were feeling really crazy, you could even add 1 T lime juice,
and a tablespoon of crushed pineapple in there, too.
too much is the right amount, kids.
don't be afraid to overdo it.
as long as you don't burn it, i think you're likely to be pleasantly surprised by what
a steady-flossin' saucemeister you are.
that's no joke.
taking pictures of food with my phone.
i doo-doo that.
and the light has been just right.
and the placesettings have been pretty tight, too.
those nappy napkins and all the one-off plates and boards have turned my kitchen
into a tightly packed hoarder's paradise.
i've got too much stuff.
that's the right amount-
now, i just need MORE space to store it in between seasons and sessions and shoots.
almost every available non-cooking surface has stuff on it!
what happened?
i turned around, and somehow stuffed all the stuff into all the spots,
and now i'm feeling a bit trapped in the test kitchen....
i need MORE ROOM, or less cuttingboards.
guess which one i'm leanning towards.
meanwhile, i'm hovering over my phone,
with controlled breaths and steadyish hands,
trying to get the right shot, on the proper plate, with the best towels and whatever else,
arranged to accentuate the tasty treats i'm about to eat...
i don't want all the same ol' same ol' ol' same sh!t,
so i gotta get the new new, but it's adding up,
all those individual bits and bobs have become an impending avalanche of bibs and boards.
if that's ever how you find me,
crushed under a landslide of napkins?
just light the whole heap on fire, and walk away.
never quiet, never soft.....

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