Saturday, July 23


the toasty roasting is the way and the light and the glory
unto all this cookie-makin' mountaintop masterwork.
masterclass maxxximum enrichment of the inner hidden hot fire
is how i'm doo-dooin' my freaky-diki sh!t in these ovens.
believe it.
i'm on some new new:
toasting the rolled oats???
you can totally taste the burly, burlesque risque sass that a little
high heat activation imbues in those flattened groats.
i'm serious.
the whole world is wide open all of a sudden,
as the coconut browns, and the oatmeal warms the F* up,
and the cookie game goes right up to eleven,
like a mutha-'ucking rocketship!!
check the rustic-type teleport:

what's the term we want to use right now?
oh.'s expert.
i used big raw sugar crystals in there,
and they got all melty among the oats and coconut,
and that got things moving and shaking in al the right ways.
you wanna make some of these?
it goes a little something like this:
1 stick of vegany butterishness
1/2 tsp salt
1/3 cup vegan creamchee' (!!!)
~almost~ 1 cup of raw sugar
2 tsp vanilla
3/4 cup applesauce
1 cup toasted coconut
1 cup toasted rolled oats
.5 cup ground coconut
.5 cup oatflour
2 cups a.p. flour
1 tsp each bakey kapow and soda
the creamchee' really fluffed these effers up.
it tends to do that, as it expands when baked.
i creamed it and the sugar and the butts and teh salt and the vanilla,
and added the applesauce after,
before i really turned it out,
and fired in the toasty bits and everything else.
i gave 'em 12 minutes in a 375F oven,
and that was all she wrote......ALMOST.
that is obvioulsy not where the story ended.
no way.
rules is rules,
and too much is the right amount.
which is why i pressed each cookie flattish first,
and dipped every one of 'em in miniature dark chocolate chip sprankles.
chocochipz are good IN cookies,
but they aren't exactly lacing when they're allowed to get loud ON 'em, either.
c is for cookies,
but cookies are an A+ all up in this place.
softish, succulent, rich roasty toasty comforting BIG flavor,
in single service circles.
we ate them in advance of dinner the other night.
you guys ever have cookie appetizers?
you need that.
chee'cake dessert, and cookie pre-dinner dessert, and dumps on our faces in between?
when it's time to get busy,
fewer are busier than this hive of hot fire hornets.
we make bees weak in their knees, nerds.
harvest and maple are here now.
in the house................asleep.
early rising is apparently the exclusive province of warrior poets,
and pretty princesses and dirty dumb dogs have all opted to remain abed.
i've already been blogging,
and i baked a big sloppy loaf of bread,
and ate breakfast,
and started a batch of ooey, gooey, crusty cinnamon rolls,
which will be ready and glazed with frosty icy icing upon their awakening.
....that's right.
i'm likely not the world's best dad,
i'm certainly the most bakin'est boy on the block.
we're together, and that's the most important part;
there's incredible food,
which is a close second.
i'm psyched on family togetherness,
and i'm grateful for the time we have ahead of us.
it's ALL really happening,
even when those lazy babies are sleeping right through it;
never  quiet, never soft.....

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