Tuesday, November 22

CHOCOLATE PRETZEL COOKIES!!

oats are probably my favorite grain.
that's real.
yes, i appreciate wheat,
and i surely love bread, and pasta, and pizza, 
and seitan, and thick-A* gravies,
and all the cakes and pies that rely on wheat for substance.
however,
i consider wheat, and it's myriad berries-
hard, soft, summer, and winter-
to be it's own thing.
i mean,
i use twenty to thirty pounds of it a month,
as the base-foundation bottom-b!tch basement-level layer of all things baked.
but,
be that as it may,
it's those oats that get me going, guys.
uh-huh.
if i gotta get a second groaty berry-seed involved,
it's probably gonna be those oats more often than everything else.
i'm just sayin'-
they're too damned good!
i made cookies.
oatmeal cookies.
that' what that lead-in was all about.
a heavy handed application of fast and slow oats,
as well as a secret weapon i found in my travels through the teej, neighbors.
check the teleport:
c'mon, man-
that's some cutesy kyooootness, right?
yeah.
i'm into that.
oatmeal cookies with chocolate covered pretzel bits are the business!
dark chocolate dipped salty pretzel sticklettes??
yum.
that's what i wanted, and i'm glad that's what i got.
the standard template exists here,
with very little variance,
yet it's still totally expert.
do it like this-
***********
1 stick + 2 T butts
1 cup light brown sugar
1/2 tsp salt
2 tsp vanilla
^creamed^
3/4 cup unsweetened applesauce
3 T maple syrup
^whisked all together^
2 cups a.p. flour
1 cup fast-actin' oats
1/2 cup thick old oats
2 tsp bakey kapowder
8 oz chocolate covered salty sticks of super-hottness
^that's the basis for your cookies, man^
i got a couple more than two dozen out of the dough,
and as usual, i baked 'em at 375F for 13 minutes in a row.
easy. easy. easy.
powdered sugar and cocoa, 2:1, with a 1/2 tsp vanilla,
and soymilk in drops until it was thick as heck, 
but still drizzlifiably wet,
striped across the surfaces, too it up a level, for sure.
and naturally, i'm aware of the rules around here,
so also activated those seasonally-specific sprankles,
to make sure you know i'm in the know about NOvember.
mmmhmmm
cookies are good,
and pretzels are good,
and chocolate is really good.
that's how it is-
besides,
i doo-doo that oaten sh!t all the time,
so, with exxxtras, it's even better than my usual,
which i'm happy to report, is miles above average anyway.
wordimus prime.
***********
it's the last day of tattshack attackin' 
before i get myself two whole days 'off' in a row.
i'll be cookin' and cleanin' and entertainin',
not to mention drivin' and doing all the other OTHER stuff i already always do-
so,
really, 
i'll just be working harder than usual, 
and for free...
it's cool.
y'can't put a pricetag on family togetherness, anyway.
i'll have my offspring here, and we'll be prepping and reppin' on hard styles,
long nights,
cold weather,
great food, 
big laughs,
and a few days of forgetting about everything else.
i'm ready.
i just have to endure a dreadfully long day of doing a ton 
of all that everything else first.
it's all really happening,
the kids, the food, the road, the dog, the work, 
the woe, the woodsly F*ing goodness,
one hundred percent unfolding at a pace that can't be slowed or sped up.
this is all there is,
and i hope that sometime soon it somehow starts to seem like enough;
never quiet, never soft.....

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