Saturday, February 11


winter time!
it's like an adventure,
only with staying warm and dry being top priority action items,
while shoveling and snow removal become increasingly hazardous,
and much more difficult to disperse,
as these fresh amounts follow the guidelines we've established...
too much is what we're getting around here,
and while it looks really tranquil,
it's a for real pain in the A* for me and crabtree,
up to my hips, and over his shark-bullet-shaped head,
on our jaunts around our local haunts.
oh, what fun!
this is new england after all, man.
and that's what you get when you live in the quaint and rustic realm
of vacationy woodsly goodness,
we've been spoiled these past few years-
i mean,
all of the skiers and snowboarders have been suffering the lack
of  frozen crystal precipitation imporving the fresh pow-pow on the slopes,
but, i mean, c'mon, that's such a waste of time,
and i don't give any sh!ts about going up and down a hill,
over and over, just for fun;
especially when you could be doing almost anything else,
which would be more useful.
the rest of us have been enjoying clear roads and walkways,
dry skies, and uninterrupted, productive work for a little while.
i s'pose that meant we were overdue for a big dump of yeti-confetti.
the same folks who drive up here from wherever
to ski up their bums or whatever
also just happen to be the most useless group of motor vehicle operators
and the least equipped to maneuver in the element they crave so desperately.
that's a plus, for sure.
importing ruiners to stimulate our local economy is awesome.
well, i mean, except for the ruining.
a snow day is cool, once in a great while,
but the magic feeling of anything being possible subsides
under the subsequent savage stormswept onslaught
of a repeatedly muffled, baffled, and buried infrastructure.
the only thing that's possible is more shoveling.
....and here we are.
exhuming ourselves out from under the winter's effluvium.
it's STILL snowing,
and it will continue to do so,
because too much is the right amount,
and when it comes to wishful winter weather-
nature wins,
and you lose.
i think we might want to stack the deck in our favor with some summery stuff.
in fact,
i'm already all about that.
and when it's time to activate ,
you KNOW i'm down to turn up all the hottness to eleven.
(i know that you think hotness is spelled with one T,
and in casual conversation you're right;
i'm talking about the hotTness. .
..and that exxxtra T?
it stands for tempestuos turbo-terrific tip-top triumph in time and temperature)
word up.
wanna see what sort of warm thoughts i've been thinking?
check out the summery-summary-type teleport:

double berry big action VEGAN CHEE'CAKE!!
c'mon, man,
y'can't even front like that's not the sexxx.
heck yeah!
i've been making chee'cakes for a minute now,
and they just keep getting better!
the crust is a key component.
i don't get down on too much smoosh.
i need a knobbly counterpoint for all that smooth.
1 1/2 pkgs of graham crackers,
with a handful of oats,
and a handful of coconut (the good kind: unsweetened and unsulphured)
and a handful of sugar-
crushed up in the food processor. NOT powdered, just crumbled,
with four tablespoons of melted vegan butters,
four tablespoons of non-dairy milk,
and a splash of vanilla.
that's the plan you gotta follow if you want what i've got, neighbors
true story.
press it all along the edges and bottom of a deep tart pan, or springform pan,
or even a pie pan if that's your thing,
and bake it at 350 for 11 minutes.
while that's cooling a bit,
let's get after that filling.
1 1/2 tubs (12 oz) vegan creamchee';
1 block pressed silken tofu;
1/4 cup powdered sugar';
2 T flour;
3 T tapioca/arrowroot;
2 T lemon juice
1/4 tsp lemon extract;
1 tsp vanilla;
3 T powdered dried strawberries;
3 T powdered dried blueberries;
^when you food process all of that together,
you get a big purple super-elite exxxplosion of all-around fruity awesomeness.
no joke.
i tossed some frozen bloobs and strawbs in with a few shakes of powdered sugar,
and dropped them right on top, still frozen,
before i popped that sweet scallop-edged circle in the oven.
baked for 30-45 minutes,
depending on how thick and gummy you like your edges.
the shorter the bake time,
the softer the center.
make a decision, and live with it, dude.
that's how life works when you're an adult.
is that it?
a two-berry bomb of soft and sweet sexy vegan chee'stuffs?
after all, rules is rules.
you know how we do-
i got lemon zest sprankles on top,
and lemon frosting around the rim.
it's called synergy, buddy.
lemon makes berries better.
that's a thing and when MORE equals BETTER,
which is usually the case,
you'd be a damned fool to settle for less.
that's essentially the guiding principle in my life these days.
i want MORE.
not in a greedy way,
i don't want to amass a stockpile to sit upon,
like a dragon on his hoard.
they always get slain, kids.
remember that.
i want a repository of all the hottness i can conceivably collect,
here in the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress,
a vaunted vault of expertism,
available to those who hear and heed the call
to just be dope, or F* right off.
that's how i'm livin' in this winter world...
but that's just me.
i mean,
you go right ahead and enjoy that chairlift or whatever, bro;
never quiet, never soft.....

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