Tuesday, June 13

NOODOO BOWLS!!!!

let's begin the day with a two-parter:
i don't even really get that crazy about noodles.
that's part one.
part two is that when i DO get into some noodles,
i still kind of go crazy.
otherwise,
what's the point?
i found some misua noods in the cupboard.
now,
the fact that i was unaware of them likely means i didn't buy them recently.
but, dried noodies are pretty hardy,
and these ones are basically salty ramen jauns,
so they're the sort to survive a mass-extinction event intact.
anyway,
i found 'em, i knew i had to use 'em,
and i got my brain focused on the bowl game.
yup.
i got home a little late, but i got it together,
and got ready to rock out a burly big-ups bowl of spicy wet curlies.
woooooooord.
neighbors,
check the teleport:

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODZZZZZZZZ!!
guys, c'mon, now.
there's at least two peoples' worth of squigglers in there.
and when all you've got is three minutes to wait for them to be ready?
you'd best believe the rest had already be there beforehand.
so,
for starters,
there's cucumber, and radish, and pea tendrils, and cilantro,
with green onion sprankles,
all competing for freshest element on the left hand side.
and then,
on the righteous right hand,
we have sweet-spicy-sour broccoli and cabbage and onion,
in sesame sauce, with fried tofu triangles,
and b&w sossamon spranks,
with those s'kyoooooot purple carrot chips,
and raddicchio ribbons for even more exxxtra colorful flavor.
seriously,
it's all crazy simple.
first you gotta get yourself started off right-
start with 1 1/2 cups of broth,
boiled up with 1/2 tsp cayenne, 1/2 tsp ground mustard, 1/2 tsp ginger,
and a couple cloves of garlic...
that's the soup base that bastes the misua.
i prefer to boil up my noodles separately,
so the starches don't ruin the final product.
so, if you have your hot liquid, and you fresh noods,
all you really need to make it expert are those hot and crawchy veg and 'fu.
and i've got more good news, buddy-
that's super easy, too!
mmhmmm.
a tablespoon of sesame oil and 1 1/2 cups of chopped cabbage,
1/2 red onion, and 2 cups of broccoli florets,
sizzled long enough to brown on one side,
blasted with some crucial sesame sweet-and-sour sauce.
covered and steamed for like i said, it's crazy simple.
....and the sauce?
 there's nothin' to it:
-
*
SAUCE!
-
2 tsp sesame oil;
3 T rice vinegar;
2 tsp agave;
1 tsp ea. GPOP;
2 tsp soy sauce;
1/2 tsp fresh cracked black pepper;
1/4 tsp cayenne.
^ stir it together and the prep is complete.
-
now, add a tablespoon of that to the veg,
and then add a tablespoon of corn starch slurried into the rest,
so you can douse the tofu once it's ready!
hmmmm?
well, yeah, man,
first we fry, then we sauce, then we FEAST.
all-sided pan-fried exxxtra-firm tofu triangles,
in a few tablespoons of sesame oil,
so all the edges are exxxtra-crispy,
glazed in that fast-actin' superthiqqq sauce,
and absolutely loaded up with the seeds.
yessiree.
if you ain't takin' the sprankle activation to eleven,
you're wasting everybody's time.
too much is the right amount, bro.
that's why those purple carrots and the radicchio were invited.
colorful is beautiful,
and plentiful is wonderful,
and everything else is bullsh!t.
i cook the food.
i eat the food.
life is simple when the stove is on.
beforehand and afterwards, it's so much more complicated.
***********
dudes,
i'm nervous.
yup.
when you're cynical, skeptical, pessimistic, suspicious,
and fitted with a set of cinnamon-hued hourglass eyeballs,
you tend to see things on the emptier half of the glass.
and that's just it, man,
whenever i can't see the portion that's missing,
i get nervous,
because it's waiting in the cut, ready to throw an unwelcome surprise party.
ok.
it's like this:
yesterday, i had all good clients.
uh-huh.
100% good.
very nice and lovely women,
pleasant ladies,
and a sweet girl.
that's a winning day, right?
right!
with simple sentimental tattoos for most,
including a big ol' military triple stacked tribute;
and ending with a borderline-bondage battle-beast blackwork blaster for the last.
all that was super nicey-nice.
seriously, a day full of clients who understood and appreciated our time together,
and added to the experience for even greater results is always a damned good day.
but,
that's exactly the problem, bro.
it ALL costs something, and whenever there's a good one on the come-up,
there's gotta be a comedown on the flipside.
yup.
oh, c'mon now-
i don't like it any more than you do,
but rules is rules.
and it gets even trickier when i stop to consider that today is all tasty ladies, too.
double-days of dopeness?
uh-oh.
that should be even better, and it would be if i was a face-value kind of fella.
but when there's twice as much sweet,
there's twice as much bitter for dessert.
ooooof.
and when the bill comes due, that invoice is gonna be a real motherF*er.
y'feel me?
i s'pose i should enjoy it while it lasts.
what's next?
who knows?
but, for now,
it's all really happening,
and it's alright;
never quiet, never soft.....

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