Friday, December 16


cookie-pie is dope.
i like cookies, i like pie,
and right about now,
i want a vigorous hybrid superstar combination of both...
i'm just sayin',
eating up one giant, soft cookie-cake,
baked in a cast-iron skillet???
i want more of it,
i mean it.
like, all the time.
where did this come from?
why now?
i had a bag of coconut flour with a weird rip in it.
i could've put it it a new plastic resealable bag, i guess.....
that's not very exciting at all.
so instead,
i used it to make some new hottness!
check the teleport:

once in a while, i get an idea,
and it goes exactly the way i envisioned it would.
call it inspired prognostication, if you'd like-
i call it being expert,
and i call this treat the TRUTH.
real talk.
make it by doing this:
preheat your oven to 360F.
cream together 1 stick vegan butts;
2 tsp vanilla;
1 cup coconut sugar;
1/2 tsp salt;
1 cup unsweetened medium flake dry coconut-
then, you're gonna wanna add:
3/4 cup applesauce
3/4 cup non-dairy milk
(i used 2/3 cup french vanilla coconut creamer, because i had it,
and the rest carton-style coconut milk- use whatever, it wont matter)
1 1/4 cup a.p. flour
1 cup + 3 T coconut flour
1 pkg freeze-dried blueberries, (reserve 1 T for the icing)
1/2 cup mini chocolate chips
^^^the results are wet thick batter, too dumb to be cake, too sloppy to be cookie,
but just right for cookie pie!!
spread it out in that cast iron jaun- i used a 10" pitch-black one,
and bake it for at least 30.
check it to be sure it's done, man.
now, i like a nice treat,
i also like there to be a LOT going on with my desserts, too.
so i added exxtra coconut on top, and raw sugar sprankles, too-
and when it cooled off?
i took it to eleven
those dry bloobs were pulverized in a spice grinder,
mixed with 1/2 cup-ish powdered sugar,
a drop of lemon extract, a dash of vanilla, and that coconut milk,
to make a dark purple drizzle that took the top into the real of turbo-hott delights.
after that,
it was simple enough-
get weird with the coconut frosting, and then take it even higher,
and freak it off with some contrast chocolate swirls.
that's right, kids.
i get into it pretty hard when i'm really into it.
good food and great treats and tons and tons of both.
that's what i look forward to, monomaniacaly tunnel-visioned,
to the exclusion of all but arctic dog-walking berserker fury.
i walk this dog, i make this food, and in-between,
i plod through a heap of tattoos to make those grocery checks, buddy.
every day is very similar,
it's only the treats that change;
never quiet, never soft.....

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