Friday, December 30

the FINAL-48

two days.
that's all.
two days are all that is left-
of this week;
of the whole month;
of the entire mutha-flippin' year;
and, mostly,
of my funtime sparklemagical family winter vacation;
yup.
we're down to the last stretch,
the finish line is in sight.
so,
what are we doing?
we're doing the best we can, man.
c'mon,.
what else is there?
food?
oh.
well, yes,
we're definitely doing a lot of THAT.
for example,
at breakfast-time,
we had big blocks of fluffy blueberry oatmeal magnificence.
that's no joke.
in fact,
check the teleport:

WORD UP.
neighbors,
these jauns have that lofty crumb like clouds of angelic heaven an' that.
i mean it.
i dunno what changed, really,
but this is yet another 'nother example
of the new new hottness that's been happening on my kitchenly exploits.
how do YOU make these?
that's simple, you do this:
-
1 cup raw sugar;
1 stick vegan butts;
1/2 tsp salt;
^creamed together^
3/4 cup soy yogurt;
2 tsp vanilla;
^folded in thoroughly^
2 cups a.p. flour;
(i use king arthur, exclusively. i've tried the rest, i stick with the best)
1 T bakey kapowder;
1/2 cup fresh-ground oats;
1/2 cup ground coconut;
1 cup non-dairy milk + 2 T lemon juice;
three big handfuls of frozen wild blueberries-
(the small ones give you more blueberry coverage, with less post-bake blarp)
on top,
i added:
4 T ground oatmeal;
4 T powdery sugs;
3 T butts;
1/4 tsp vanilla;
mashed into a sticky mass, like exxxtra-wet cookiedough,
and dolloped on top.
when baked at 360F for 33 minutes,
the toppin' melts along the surface,
and seals in some of the blueberry moisture,
which in turn gives these guys a steamy loftiness
that elevates the whole dang experience.
real talk.
...and with a pat of butter in the middle,
gettin' all melty in the crannies and sh!t while it's still warm???
c'mon.
if you can't hang out with that,
you're definitely some kind of an A*-hole.
-
i'll be doing my damnedest to make these again.
of course,
that's difficult to do when i'm always moving forward.
really.
there's so many things i want to make,
and only so much time,
and oven space,
and flour on hand at any given moment.
i'll do what i can to recollect and replicate
these righteous right-angled breakfast blocks,
but there's a high likelihood that instead,
i'll just end up exploring some other other new-new,
and whatever happens is what we'll be talking about next time.
***********
two days left.
that's it.
this was a weird year for tattooing in the woodsly goodness.
that's a thing.
uh-huh.
i did more tattoos than i quite possibly ever have before,
and i enjoyed far fewer of the than ever,
and far less than i would've guessed was possible.
awwwwwww.
that needs to be amended, man.
in regards to that-
yesterday,
i had my friend ari in for some work on his sleeve,
and today,
it's my good buddy beau sitting all day for more work on HIS sleeve,
pretty good, no?
uh-huh.
but what's that mean for manana?
it means the pricetag is high, and the bill is due.
every good day costs something.
remember that.
and nobody leaves with the title, friends.
remember that, too.
i will leave 2016 behind no worse off than any other prior year.
that's the one benefit of hermitage in the high hills of the far north-
essentially,
ever day is already the hardest style,
and that makes all the everydays identically difficult.
duders,
when it's all bad, all the time,
you're really kind of un-F*-withable, relatively speaking...
i'm prepared for these final hours-
we've got burnable bits stockpiled high,
a refrigerator packed with ingredients,
movies cued up on deck for the evening,
and family togetherness of the most stir-crazy and abrasive sort,
all tied into these tiny times that are left to us-
it's a sort of snow day hospice for the end of the year.
we may not go out on top,
but i can promise you that we will at least exit with full and satisfied stomachs.
last meals are a courtesy extended to even the worst of the worst, after all.
wordimus prime.
play to your strengths if you've only got time for one last play.
that's smart.
you'll still lose, naturally, at the last minute,
but there's no reason to make it too easy-
no matter what,
nobody likes a quitter;
never quiet, never soft.....

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