BIRTHDAY BASH.

bruh,
what about a BURLY BARBARIAN BERSERKER BATTLE-BEASTLY
BIRTHDAY BIG-ACTION BANH MI?!?!
yeah!
i doo-doo that freaky sh!t,
and i took it to a whole new impossibly expert realm of flavor and texture.
how?
with pate'-toes-
huh?
banh mi sometimes gets the most filthy by using foie-gras.
youknow what?
pate' is F*ing SOOOO gross
but potatoes?
they're super DOPE.
guys,
i activated some custom fritters,
with all the elite flavor you could hope for,
and they boosted my birthday meal up and over the horizon,
and into untold uncharted realms of that new hottness.
that's real talk.
check the banh-banh-type teleport:

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORD!!!!!
let me just tell you about that potato magic first and foremost-
one large white potato, with skin, and 1/4 onion,
boiled up until soft was where i started.
to that, i added:
1/3 cup chick pea flour;
2 T soy sauce;
3 T texas/louisiana-style ho'sauce;
GPOP;
1/4 cup arrowroot powder;
sriracha flakes, ground mustard, and molto black pepper.
HOLY EFFING SH!T, neighbors.
pan-fried in oil, until both sides were crispy,
and the centers were soft still?????
my face is  sad without more of this in it.
that's no joke.
and the tofu?
dry-fried, then zapped with a lil' oil and some sesame seeds,
to give it a little zip and vim and zing-
very dope.
the slaw?
version one, on the sandwich,
had radicchio, and purple and green cabbage, with salt,
lime juice, and vegenaise,
and the side order had all of that,
plus parsley and cilantro, and a whole mess of black pepper,
as well as a radishy microgreen upgrade.
boom.
that's dope.
but,
back to that epic banh mi-
pickle stackers on the bottom, then slaw for your jaw.
 those heroic fritters came next,
then thin rings of red onion,
and a gently pickled carrot radish salad.
mmmmmmm.
salt, sugar, vinegar, and time, kids.
that's all.
it was crunchy, it was spicy, and it was rad.
also,
it was the perfect platform to spread that 'fu atop.
that's an awful lot of sandwich, but it didn't stop there-
no way.
on MY berfday,
i keep it as real as real can be.
and anyway,
too much is the right amount,
so bringin' that diaperywaterbaby bullsh!t wasn't really an option,
recognize.
so,
there's also cilantro,
AND thinly sliced freshie-fresh jalapeno,
AND baby basil bud sprankles,
AND  vegan mayo magic on the bread,
AND fresh-ground sriracha flakes on that!!!!
...and speaking on bread,
that's homemade sprouted whole wheat semi-sourdough, son!!!
toasted to a golden goodness on the inside-
crispy on top, and browned on the bottom thanks to the hearthstone in my oven,
friends,
i had the best sandwich ever,
on the one day that always finds a new way to reminds me how much i matter.
ouch.
also,
i had spicy cucumber and lime.
that was nice.
oh, and braised bokchoy, with a sesame sossamon seeded, sesame oil finish,
to complete the look.
i call bullsh!t on anybody trying to talk to me about banh mi.
this one is THE TRUTH.
the rest are all acolytes.
*
sandwich week ends today.
i hope it goes out with a bigger bang than my berfday did.
what?
oh, it wasn't bad.
it just faded to black without a finale.
no conflict, no resolution.
just more time, spanned, and spent.
today is a new day.
the first, the last, the latest, the greatest(?)
we'll see how it goes;
never quiet, never soft.....