Friday, April 14


i tattooed my coworker's face yesterday.
no, not his forehead.
why does everyone always say that?
his face face, like his temple and his cheek.
tattooing is cool some of the time,
but, tattooing faces?
that's always kind of a big deal.
i mean,
it's his F*ing face.
the thing is,
i was just fixing up some already-there stuff.
that's the thing, man.
you don't wanna have a tattoo on your face that you aren't that into.
like i just said,
it's your F*ING FACE!
the old stuff needed a little nicey-nice performed on it,
so i did it over, and hooked it up,
and i think everybody is better off because of it.
you have your version of doing good deeds,
and i have mine.
y'know what else i have?
a really cool loaf pan.
it's a springform, with a spillover well around it,
and it's tall and long as heck.
i don't use it often,
but when i do,
i make something especially rectangular.
that's just how that works.
do i have a picture of the dude's face?
did i snap a shot of that cool pan?
umm, that's a no, too.
have i got a glamour shot of a super chocolate coconut log?
damned straight i do, bro,
they're called priorities.
and that's where mine are situated
check the teleport:

i love a super rich cake,
i also happen to have a soft spot for brown sugary stuff.
and i've got a serious predisposition towards sprankles.
which is why i'm so psyched on this treat!
freshly-ground unsweetened unsulphured flake coconut is your friend.
if you aren't friends yet, introduce yourself,
and if, once you've met, you don't get along?
congrats, you're not very cool.
for all the rest of us, tho,
we're about to be elbows deep in dopeness, and that's no joke.
you want to know what's dwelling inside this burly barbarian block
of brown sugary sweet lovin' and such?
here's the list:
1 stick vegan butterish;
1/2 tsp salt;
2 tsp vanilla;
1 cup brown sugar;
1/3 cup cocoa;
3/4 cup coconut-milk yogurt.
^mash and mush and whip and whisk all that up together,
and then add in:
1 cup freshly-crushed coconut, ground to a coarse flour;
2 cups a.p. flour;
4 T tapioca;
1 T cornstarch;
2 tsp bakey kapowpow;
1 tsp bakey soda;
1 cup coconut milk (the drinking kind, not the can kind)
hand-stir it all together.
with a flippin' spatula.
i knowwwwww i always recommend the stand mixer,
and really, you should still get one,
but this chunky crumbly cakey magic doesn't need it.
that's all i'm sayin'.
grease and flour your sorcerously sexxy loaf pan,
or a round springform,
or two 8" rounds,
or whatever,
and bake the batter,
at 350F, for 30-50 minutes depending on which container it's in.
my long loaf pan is tall and deep and big as heck,
so it took almost an hour,
during which time the sides got crispy, like a brownie,
and the middle was jusssssssst this side of finished.
it's soft and moist,
it's still fully-baked-through.
....and it's also SO nice!
that's a nice piece of work, but i couldn't just leave it naked and alone.
which is why i dressed it for success on top!
a little coconut oil, a little of that coconut milk,
and a whole bunch of dark chocolate, melted together,
had the ganache game going strong and long in glistening glaze
and in the domination of the drizzle dribble.
we got ourselves the big flaky shrapnel flakes of coconutty sprankles,
AND more drizzles on top of all of that.
c'mon, friends.
by now you should already know what's up:
too much is the right amount.
anything other than that is a fall-shortening of your utmost potential.
and we wouldn't want to do that, would we?
no way.
i'm cutting slice after slice, and i'm liable to keep it up until it's all gone.
bye bye, cake.
every single day, dudes.
y'gotta make something good.
or do something good.
or be good at something.
or get good and mad at something that isn't any good.
here's the thing:
active participation, like activism, requires activation.
a little,
but if you aren't actively seeking improvements,
then you're missing the whole point.
this is IT, man,
it's all really happening.
you can't mush in your seat,
you can't slump in your space,
you've gotta DO some sh!t.
don't give me reasons why you can't.
i'm not listening.
you're not excused.
there's always something to do.
so get active, get into it, and go after it.
i don't care what it is you're on about-
just make sure it's good;
never quiet, never soft.....

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