Friday, April 14


it's bright out at 7 p.m.?
that's pretty good news.
that means a lot of things,
but most importantly to me,
it means that now, when i get home,
provided i've got a plan in place,
i can indulge in my one bright spot in the lightness of late day.
that's my favorite.
not feeling like a nocturnal cave dweller as i fix up something expert
in the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress test kitchen laboratory,
under the gigantic artificial daylight bulb above my head...
as long as i'm home in a timely manner, 
pending on-schedule appointments,
and traffic permitting,
i'll be cooking in broad day.
that's that natural sh!t,
and that's the best kind.
what happened last night, in the dusk's fading light?
i alliterated incorrectly,
and made something hot and spicy for my face,
along the lines of thai thursday!!!
oh, c'mon, kids.
you like it.
sweet and sour and spicy noods?
you know i'm all about the spicy noods, bro.
that's real.
i had a choice to make-
soak those nicey-nice ricey straps in hot water for twenty five minutes,
boil them for 4.
as if there was a choice.
i'm hungry right NOW, neighbors.
what's this half-an-hour-from-now bullsh!t all about?
it's about to be dismissed from the options is what it is.
word up.
i had heated, drained and rinsed noodles ready in under ten minutes.
and that had me eating all the hot fire so much faster, 
and out from under the lightbulbs, too.
y'wanna see what's up?
check the teleport:
i had it sizzlin' away at rough chopped onion, 
sliced garlic slabs, carrot discs, celery wedges, and broccoli florets,
util all of that was ready for a crucial sauce.
i added my noodoo doo-doo to the mix, 
and drenched all of it in quick-thickening slurry of sweet, sour, 
hot sriracha and agave glazin' amazin'ness!!!
here's what that entailed:
2 T srircaha;
2 T rice vinegar;
2 T agave;
2 T tamaru;
1 T chili-garlic paste
2 cloves crushed garlic;
1 tsp GPOP;
1/2 tsp ginger;
1/2 tsp ground coriander seed;
2 T mae-ploy bloppity glops. (it's sauce, boss. go get some)
1 T cornstarch-
whisk that all up, and when it hits the high heat?
instant subgum thickness, and total absorption into those noodles, too.
are they coconutty?
devilishly so,
pretty tangy, to say the least.
agave don't play, baby.
and all those veggies,
and all those noodles were accompanied by green lettuces, 
and pea tendrils,
and F*ing microgreens
plus, those cooooooool crunchy cucumbers which always improve upon spicy stuff.
the without the bitter the sweet isn't as sweet,
and without the cool, the hot isn't as hot.
it's a study in textural and temperature contrasts, and it works.
but that's not all.
how could it be?
rules is rules, right?
coconut-oil fried tofu wedges, exxxtra-crispy skinned, but so soft in the centers!
and those were dusted in sriracha flake sprankles!
jussssssst the babiest bit of hot fire, subtle, but present, 
on top of all that sexxxy soybean business.
is that it?
i toasted up some cashews in that oil, too.
and they were great.
but you could've guessed that, i'll bet.
all that was left was to put some refreshing cilantro sprig sprankles on top.
word up.
....and check that lighting!
the thing about cooking all the time?
you just DO it.
there's not a lot of thought about process.
you want food, you make food.
that's all.
so, recounting the process is harder than you might imagine.
i hope maybe somebody out there is using this sh!t as a guideline,
or inspiration, or something other than entertainment.
of course,
if entertainment is what this offers, 
i'm actually pretty much ok with that too.
we don't get to pick how we're interpreted.
that's why we always show greater appreciation for the ones 
who get us in the ways we want to be gotten.
there's facets on our facets,
and prisms of personality refracting and reflecting 
and kaleidoscopically reverberating in every damned direction.
shoutouts to the folks who cook this stuff.
and shoutouts to the people who appreciate wordplay.
and also, shouts-to-the-outs for all those dudes 
who enjoy the interjections of honest real life....
no-fives to all the spectators who only look at the pictures.
you guys are jerks.
everybody else?
thanks for reading.
hope there's something in it for you;
never quiet, never soft.....

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